7-18-14 Haven't I done this before?

I am an independent person. Very independent. Since I was a child. Always. I'll do it my own way and when I want to! When I was two-years-old I decided I would NOT nap anymore. (What foolishness in my little heart!!) When Mom told me that my response, deep in my heart, was "No child of mine will ever give up their nap at 2-years-old!"  Well, guess when three out of my four kids gave up their naps???

Anyhow, I had given Loy a charge…keep my phone so that I don't make any silly, nonsensical texts. And Loy, being the legalistic, rule-follower he is, took me at my word. However, he is not quite up to the challenge of sneaky Kitt. I guess whenever he was out of the room I would snatch up my phone and start typing away. I don't think I did anything too crazy, but if I did, I'll pay you $1,000 to keep it to yourself!!!  Today when we were talking about it I quoted "Galaxy Quest"--which we had just watched on Sunday. He was kind of upset with me fighting him on the job I had given him. I said he should have said, "I have one job on this ship. It's stupid. But it's the only thing I do!!!!" I think he laughed at that.

Chemo Day is very long. It's not a bad day because you (the patient) are pumped full of lots of pharmaceuticals. You feel pretty good--kind of sleepy and not too worried. So, for me they began with the pre-meds, anti-nausea drugs (2 of them), non-anxiety med, bag of fluids, then the first chemo drug (this is at about an hour or so in to the treatment.) It can causer peripheral neuropathy (meaning your fingers and toes can get numb or painful or tingly as a side effect.) So they wrapped my feet and hands in ice packs during that time. Then we moved on to two bags of fluids--at over an hour each bag. You can imagine that there were several trips to the bathroom during this time. They just unplug the IV pole and in you go.

Finally you get to the really high powered drug, the one that has required all these bags of fluid. It can do kidney damage so they want to make sure it just comes in and then out of your kidneys. So, another hour and a half for that, then one more bag of fluid, then you go.

I slept some (and snored--now Loy has medical proof!!! That is really bad news for me!!!!) and got a care package from a friend, and listened to music. We tried to watch TV but didn't have any good shows, so turned that off. Nurses are in and out, so we talked with them. Loy went out and got lunch for us at one point.

Today I feel kind of tired and, while not nauseous, my tummy just doesn't feel quite 100% right. "They" say that if I am going to get nauseous it would probably hit on Sunday, so I'm planning on staying home from church to see how it goes.

My hair will vamoose probably on Friday, so I plan on shaving it on Thursday. I have two blonde wigs someone gave me, 15 or so hats (same donator), and 8 or so scarves, so I should be set and styling'!!

This cancer has been rated a Stage 2b. The size alone makes it go to at least Stage 2. The b is, I guess, because it touches the chest wall. I asked when we could see it shrinking and she said there is a possibility by the next appointment, but don't be concerned if it takes a while longer. No imaging will be done until chemo is all done, though. Then the surgeon will want some for planning purposes, I guess. And, the goal is not to shrink the tumor. It is to get it gone completely!! YAY! I'd be all for that! But we would still go ahead with a bilateral mastectomy anyway. I do NOT want to go through this again.

It was a different doctor last time and she had trouble finding the lump too, so I don't feel quite so badly that I missed it! It is positioned kind of weird and goes from front to back, so it's just not easily detected.

When I was in for my port on Monday an official hospital employee woman came in and said, "I'm your breast navigator." What???? I have a breast navigator? That's like having staff!!!  I had given Lex my phone that day and she kept handing it to me to read a text, just like I imaging Gayle does for Oprah. I felt like a movie star or something!!

My breast navigator had given me a book that said on the front, "It's all About You…" and then she wrote in my name. So, there you have it…"It's All About You Kitt!!" I KNEW IT!! I always knew it!!!

Oh, and I don't have just any port. I have a "Power Port." We're still trying to figure out just what Super Powers I inherited from that--teleportation? invisibility? ability to fight off cancer monsters??

My visualization for this cancer is that the chemotherapy is like little cartoonized piranhas--chomping away at the tumor. Feasting. Let's hope so.

Here's a picture of me and a monkey, given to me by my special friend, Dawn. Part of what makes this so special is that this particular monkey belonged to her beloved son, Jake, who was killed in a car accident about four years ago. He was quite a comfort to me yesterday!! Thank you, Dawn!!

And now, the cutest little window display you'll ever see!! Payton is at the shoe store (the one that opened yesterday) that my three boys have started. It is in Sioux Falls and, if you want to stop by, they would love to see you!!! It's called the "605 Running Company" and they will do a great job of fitting you in some terrific shoes!!

Thank you for all your prayers. I feel them. Really. Pray these little piranhas would eat and eat and eat. Pray my tummy would stay calm. Pray for endurance for my pill manager (Loy), driver (Loy), scheduler (Loy), cook (Loy), exercises (Loy). etc. (Loy).

Love,

Kitt.